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Saturday, June 12, 2010

Computer History of the World - A different perspective

In the beginning, God created the Bit and the Byte.


And from those he created the Word.



And there were two Bytes in the Word; and nothing else existed.

And God separated the One from the Zero;

and he saw it was good.



And God said - Let the Data be; And so it happened.

And God said - Let the Data go to their proper places.

And he created floppy disks and hard disks and compact disks.



And God said - Let the computers be, so there would be a place

to put floppy disks and hard disks and compact disks.

Thus God created computers and called them hardware.



And there was no Software yet. But God created programs;

small and big... And told them - Go and multiply yourselves

and fill all the Memory.



And God said - I will create the Programmer;

And the Programmer will make new programs and govern over

the computers and programs and Data.



And God created the Programmer; and put him at Data Center;

And God showed the Programmer the Catalog Tree and said

You can use all the volumes and subvolumes

but do not use Windows.



And God said - It is not good for the programmer to be alone.

He took a bone from the Programmer's body and created

a creature that would look up at the Programmer;

and admire the Programmer; and love the things

the Programmer does; And God called the creature:

the User.



And the Programmer and the User were left under

the DOS and it was Good.



But Bill was smarter than all the other creatures of God.

And Bill said to the User - Did God really tell you

not to run any programs?



And the User answered - God told us that we can use every

program and every piece of Data but told us not to run

Windows or we will die.



And Bill said to the User - How can you talk about something

you did not even try. The moment you run Windows

you will become GENIOUS. You will be able to create anything

you like by a simple click of your mouse.



And the User saw that the fruits of the Windows were nicer

and easier to use. And the User saw that any knowledge

was useless--since Windows could replace it.



So the User installed the Windows on his computer;

and said to the Programmer that it was good.



And the Programmer immediately started to look for new drivers.

And God asked him--What are you looking for?



And the Programmer answered

--I am looking for new drivers because I can not find them

in the DOS.



And God said - Who told you need drivers?

Did you run Windows?



And the Programmer said - It was Bill who told us to!



And God said to Bill - Because of what you did, you will be hated

by all the creatures. And the User will always be unhappy with you.

And you will always sell Windows.



And God said to the User - Because of what you did,

the Windows will disappoint you and eat up all your Resources;

and you will have to use lousy programs;

and you will always rely on the Programmers help.



And God said to the Programmer - Because you listened to

the User, you will never be happy. All your programs will have

errors and you will have to fix them and fix them to the end of time.



And God threw them out of the Data Center

and locked the door and secured it with a password

STRENGTH

We don't always have to be strong
sometimes our strength is expressed in
 being vulnerable.
Sometimes we need to fall apart to regroup
 and stay on track.
We all have days when we cannot push any header,
cannot hold back self-doubt,
cannot stop focusing on fear,
cannot be strong.
These are the days when we cannot focus on
 being responsible.
Occasionally, we don't want to get out of
 our pajamas.
Sometimes we cry in front of people.
We expose our tiredness, irritability, or anger.
Those days are okay. They are just okay.
Part of taking care of ourselves means
we give ourselves permission to "fall apart"
when we need to.
We do not need to be perpetual tower of strength.
We ARE strong.
We have proven that.
Our strength will continue if we allow ourselves
the courage to feel scared, weak, and vulnerable.
when we need to experience those feelings.
Today help me to know that is okay to
allow myself to be human.
Help me not to feel guilty or punish myself
when i need to "fall apart".

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Interesting Facts

1. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."















2. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "MT"














3. Almonds are members of the peach family.














4. The symbol on the "pound" key (#) is called an octothorpe.














5. The dot over the letter 'I is called a tittle.














6. Ingrown toenails are hereditary.














7. The word "set" has more definitions than any other word in the English language.














8. "Underground" is the only word in the English language that begins and ends with the letters "und."














9. There are only four words in the English language which end in "-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.














10. The longest word in the English language, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is pneumonoultramicros copicsilicovolca noconiosis.














11. The only other word with the same amount of letters is its plural: pneumonoultramicros copicsilicovolca noconiosesl.














12. The longest place-name still in use is Taumatawhakatangiha ngakoauauotamate aturipukakapikim aungahoronukup okaiwe-nuakit natahu, a New Zealand hill.














13. Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reinade Los Angeles de Porciuncula" and can be abbreviated to 3.63% of its size,L.A.














14. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.














15. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.














16. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button. It was eliminated when he was sewn up after surgery.














17. Telly Savalas and Louis Armstrong died on their birthdays.














18. Donald Duck's middle name is Fauntleroy.














19. The muzzle of a lion is like a fingerprint - no two lions have the same pattern of whiskers.














21. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.














23. There is a seven-letter word in the English language that contains ten words without rearranging any of its letters, "therein": the,there, he, in, rein, her, here, ere, therein, herein.














24. Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.














26. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.














27. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.














28. Cranberries are sorted for ripeness by bouncing them; a fully ripened cranberry can be dribbled like a basketball.














30. The letters KGB stand for Komitet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosti














31. 'Stewardesses' is the longest English word that is typed with only the left hand.














33. The combination "ough" can be pronounced in nine different ways; the following sentence contains them all: "A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed."














34. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.














35. Facetious and abstemious contain all the vowels in the correct order, as does arsenious, meaning "containing arsenic."














36. Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the Australian seal for that reason.








37. Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only have about ten.








38. The word "Checkmate" in chess comes from the Persian phrase "Shah Mat," which means "the king is dead."








39. The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight staircases.

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Try everything twice. On Madam's tombstone (of Whelan's and Madam) she said she wanted this epitaph: "Tried everything twice...loved it both times!"


2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches.)

3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain get idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with him/her.

6. The tears happen: Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. LIVE while you are alive.


7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them at every opportunity.

11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second chance.

12. Lost time can never be found.